SCARF from the inside

SCARF is a wonderful and eye-opening thinking model for Personal Safety. There are tons of articles about what SCARF means and I do not need to go through them in this article. Many are the coaches and leaders who like the model which is easy to describe and connect to.

I have got more knowledge by listening to people and also myself. Another valuable source is the Farnam street blog with many fascinating interviews.

Blindspot

How should you design interactions in an online world? When people involved in potential conflicts are harder to read and reach out to. It is so much easier to hide when other people cannot read your full body language

Is it the person who feels the heart that will speak up, take the conflict, and take responsibility for the threat or anger inside? How can we recognize someone who feels threatened, angry, disconnected, socially rejected, or treated unfairly? Can we expect them to speak up or do they smile and hide everything inside?

The persons not aware of any “threats” are not acting on a purpose, may not understand at all why.

This leads to team members who do not raise their voices and just say OK. Decisions are taken without real consensus and all, sometimes valuable, opinions are not coming into play.

There is plenty of advice on how to deal with it, but if the situation is already there it can be very tricky to go backward and remove feelings and behavior.

Do not want to go into a discussion we a person with who I am in conflict. It might be threatening or pointless.

A person that suffers has a multitude of excuses for not speaking, such as:

“It’s probably just me”
“I am not qualified”
“I do not want to hurt people”
I do not want to take other peoples valuable time”

If the manager or colleagues says: “Thanks for being open. Take some time off for healing”. This leaves the person to his own thoughts and feelings. Another well-intentioned message is “If you need, just call!”

Do you think a person who feels bad will respond positively?

Time is another factor dividing peoples perception. Fast or slow reaction. Rememebers situations in different imagages.

Are you an introvert or extrovert personality?

Work from home is popular, it means less traveling, and all that comes with Managers like it

References

5 Things Your Team Need to Feel Rewarded & Not Threatened

http://halehr.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/developing-leaders-with-360-assessments-david-rock.pdf

https://connectconsultinggroup.com/making-scarf-a-daily-habit/

The model enables people to more easily remember, recognize, and potentially modify the core social domains that drive human behavior. Labelling and understanding these drivers draws conscious awareness to otherwise non conscious processes,